Before I took the bold step of deactivating my Facebook account, I had been feeling increasingly lonely and isolated in the evenings. My daughter would be asleep, the dishes would be done, something mindless like Don’t Tell The Bride would be on television, and I’d feel sort of empty and uncomfortable while scrolling through my News Feed. Viewing Facebook made me feel so inadequate. It’s not that the content I was viewing was so aspirational, that I felt I couldn’t contend. Rather, I just couldn’t fathom why I was wasting significant time of an evening looking at the drunken party photos of people I barely know or like. Did I really have nothing better to do? Facebook was the ultimate method of procrastination. There’s always something new to look at, but really, nothing is original.
I thought about deleting the people I wasn’t actually friends with, but that would amount to about 95% of my 200+ “friends”. An experiment where I removed my birthday from my profile showed that only about ten contacts know me well enough to remember my date of birth. The people that did remember phoned me on the day anyway. What purpose did Facebook really serve in my life if it didn’t assist me in keeping up to date with friends and “connecting” me to the people I don’t see as much as I’d like?
In addition to the fact it didn’t enrich my life in anyway, it also made me feel like a bitch. I figured that if I take pleasure in my photos of my acquaintances looking dreadful on a night out, people could hypothetically criticise bad photos of me… if such a thing existed. For a voracious gossip like myself, I’m not very comfortable with online voyeurism.
Facebook began to be referenced in every conversation I had, and I felt secretly embarrassed by the degree to which my social life revolved around it. One night, when reading the lurid details of two break-ups on splashed across the Walls of my acquaintances, I decided to leave the circus behind and deactivate. SInce then, I have felt more content and been more productive. I’m one of those people who is annoyingly evangelical about any step I make to improve my life, so I’ll take this opportunity to urge you to do the same as I did and get out. I actually feel sorry for people with Facebook accounts now. Those stuck in the endless cycle of refresh-scroll-click-refresh are basically denying themselves the right to thrive. (Yes, I feel that strongly that Facebook is a confidence and motivation killer).
I will log in soon to retrieve the phtographs I lost when my MacBook was wiped just before Christmas, but after that, I won’t darken the doorway of the place again. When people ask me in an incredulous way why I don’t have a Facebook account, I politely inform them that I have a life instead. ZING!
Born this way,
Some of my favourite things about the Christmas and New Year period were the amount of time I got to spend with Violet. I had no impending coursework, I hardly worked at all, and she let me sleep until nine o’clock most mornings. We had late, unrushed breakfasts for a change, and spent our afternoons watching films and eating.
Christmas Day was blissful, although the mild (almost warm) weather was perturbing. After Violet and I had tackled her obscene pile of presents, we went to my parents’ house where more gifts and an amazing meal awaited us. We had roasted pork loin stuffed with apple and black pudding with a creamy mustard sauce, dauphinois potatoes and red cabbage with cranberries. So dreamy. I made sure I was home for the televisual highlight of all-time: The Downton Abbey Christmas special. Ugh. SO GOOD.
Hogmanay involved me going to bed at 2230 to play Professor Layton on my Nintendo DS, but unfortunately I didn’t get to sleep before the firework insanity erupted four doors down from me. Thankfully, Violet didn’t wake up.
New Year’s Day was spent roaming around Westburn and Victoria Parks. I love seeing Violet making new friends and attacking climbing frames like a little adventurer. We spent the afternoon watching Harry Potter and eating pancakes. Eating was absolutely the main theme of the holiday, and so it should be. I think I was averaging about five full meals a day at one point! I gained a nominal amount of weight that I’m not even going to actively deal with until my last piece of coursework is handed in on Friday the 13th. It’ll probably be gone by then anyway.
So, I suppose I should mention my goals and resolutions for the year.
I have silly ones like continue my eyebrow-plucking hiatus until I no longer have to draw on my ridiculous Scouse-brow, and trying to stop my arms from becoming any more muscular. My more serious resolutions are to run my household finances like a business would, with no unnecessary spending. I also want to sort Violet’s diet out, as she basically lives off peas, strawberries, macaroni and toast right now.
One resolution I have stuck with so far is to win the Euromillions. So far in 2012, I have spent £8 and won £41.60. That’s a pretty good return! Another resolution to was to get rid of my Facebook account, which I swiftly and painlessly did on Christmas Eve. More on that another day. I’m going to blog more and blog better, and use my time on the internet way more effectively.
I will update soon with something more interesting. In the mean time, my To Do List for this week is looking pretty good:
I need to finish my last piece of coursework.
I need to find a new perfume. I’ve enjoyed being a Vera Wang Lovestruck girl, but need a new day-to-day signature scent.
I need to clear out under my bed. (Board games still in their shrink-wrap, empty Quavers packets and countless odd earrings were just some of the treasures revealed when I lifted my mattress last night)
I need to decide whether or not to buy a handbag from my work that I’ve had my eye on ever since we got it in. It’s at a very good price right now, and I do need a bigger bag for my university stuff. I just don’t want to contravene my self-imposed ‘No Unnecessary Spending’ rule so early in the year.
Born to be wild,